Bryan’s Journal of Miracles As told by his mom … March 17, 1980 - January 9, 2004

List of those mentioned in the journal:

Mike - Bryan’s Father
Kathy - Bryan's Mom (me)
Amberly - Bryan’s Sister
Cris - Bryan’s Brother
"My Mom" - Bryan’s Grandma Mary
"My Dad" - Bryan’s Grandpa Ray
Sherry - Bryan’s aunt (my sister) who is clairvoyant
Darlene - Bryan’s aunt (my sister)
Debbie - Bryan’s aunt (my sister)
Lori - Bryan’s aunt (my sister)
Sherry S. - Bryan’s aunt (Mike’s sister)
Bev - Bryan’s aunt (Mike’s sister)
Barb - Bryan’s aunt (Mike’s sister)
Kelly - Bryan’s cousin (Darlene’s daughter, my niece)
Joe - Bryan’s cousin (Sherry S’s son who passed away a few years ago)
Jacob - Bryan's cousin (Lori's son)
Mike R. - Sherry’s husband (Bryan’s uncle through marriage)
Connie - my sister who died at birth
Bob & Ruth - Bryan’s Grandma and Grandpa (Mike’s parents, deceased)
Grandma & Grandpa LaGambo - Bryan’s Great-Grandma & Great-Grandpa (Kathy’s grandparents, deceased)
Brooke - Bryan’s high school girlfriend and his first true love
Paul Becker - Lori’s friend from childhood who had been an addict all his life and died in his 40’s
Josh D. - Bryan’s childhood friend
Carol - Bryan’s friend from high school
Marge - my friend
Citte - my friend from California who met Bryan last summer
Chad - Bryan’s childhood friend
Ruthie - Our neighbor and long-time friend
Jessica - Bryan's Friend
Ric - Bryan's Friend
Jason (Jay) - Bryan's Friend
Ed - My business partner and long-time friend

Sunday, January 1, 2006

Wow!  It's so hard to believe that we are now going on two years since Bryan has been gone.  It still seems like only yesterday.  First of all, happy new year to all of you out there!  When we went down to visit Bryan's grave today, we saw that someone had left a little statue of a praying woman next to his nameplate.  No name ... so we don't know who to thank ... but thank you for thinking of him.  We brought a Christmas centerpiece that we had received as a gift and we wanted to share it with him, so we made room for it there.  As I moved one of the flower vases, there was a penny beneath it.  I don't know if someone left it or not, but it made me smile.  Maybe Bryan put it there for us or maybe a friend left it ... either way, it made us happy.  And the entire time we were there, a hawk was perched on the steeple watching us.  On the way home, I called Amberly to tell her about the little statue and she said that she had just looked at the clock right before I called and the time was 3:17 ... I then realized that we had inadvertently gone to visit him and were at his grave at that exact time.  Pretty wild "coincidence"
... the number 17 just keeps popping up continually.  Almost every time I awake during the night, I can be assured that the clock will be on 17 and usually 3:17.  Almost without fail ...

Tuesday, January 3

This morning I had to run out for a dentist appointment and when I returned home, Cris was all excited about a job opportunity.  I turned on the light in the kitchen and as he was talking, it began blinking on and off several times.  It was almost as if Bryan was there and letting us know he was excited too!  After a few minutes, it stopped blinking and remained on steady the rest of the day. 

Later this afternoon, Cris and I went out shopping and the first sign I had of Bryan was a hawk in a tree beside the road as we drove past.  Then a truck pulled directly in front of us with the license plate "3179" .. his birthday and the day he died (9).  Several more license plates showed up in front of us with various combinations of the numbers (109) (9317) etc.  More than what could be considered just coincidence.  And when we were in one store, they had on a cd of Frank Sinatra songs ... Cris' favorites!  We both noticed it and felt Bryan was with us.

Saturday, January 7

I think Bryan knows that we are missing him and feeling especially sad right now as the second anniversary of his passing is drawing near.  A few days ago, Cris and I had gone shopping for a new full size mattress for his room to replace the twin he's outgrown.  As I was driving to work today, the first thing that caught my attention was a white Impala alongside me and right in front of him was a truck with a new mattress and box spring in the back.  And the number "17" in the license plate.  OK, pretty neat .. .maybe it was Bryan letting me know that he is aware of what's happening in our lives, maybe just coincidence.  Either way, it put a smile on my face.  But a few minutes later, as I passed the truck, two more signs happened almost simultaneously:  a hawk in a tree beside the road and an SUV in front of me with the license plate "Darlene".   Ok, how is that a sign?  Well, we are giving Cris' twin mattress to -- guess who -- DARLENE!!!  The synchronicity of all these things happening within 3 or 4 minutes convinced me that it was Bryan and he is very much aware of what's going on in our lives.  For the past two days, we've had mattresses and box springs in our entryway and living room.  And he sees that!   It made me feel a little better as I've been pretty teary-eyed recently every time I think of him.  It is going on two years but it seems like only yesterday I last saw him and spoke with him and heard him laugh.  No matter how many years go by, that will never change .....

Sunday, January 8

This morning, I was saying the rosary in Bryan's room as I usually do every Sunday morning.  It's a time for me to meditate and feel closer to him.  It's especially hard today because this is the date I last saw him alive two years ago, so it's just really hard.  As I was praying, I began to feel a burning, tingling feeling all over my head.  It was a weird feeling and I immediately thought of him but couldn't be sure it was him.  Shortly after this, I was relaxing in the bathtub and reading "Five People You Meet in Heaven" when the light blinked off.  I set the book down and with tears in my eyes, I began to talk to Bryan.  I asked him if it was him I felt when I was in his room praying a short while ago.  IMMEDIATELY the light came back on.  I knew then that it was him.  I told him I wish I could see him again ....

A short time later, as I was driving to work, something made me look to the left of my car and there were TWO hawks in the trees alongside the road.  As I looked at them, one took off from the branch he was on and flew alongside my car all the way up the road I was on.  When I had gotten in the car to go to work, I "felt" that I would see a hawk, so I wasn't really surprised when I saw it ... but TWO ... and the way he took off and flew beside me just made me sure that Bryan had something to do with it.  I think he knows how I feel today.

An article appeared in the Post Gazette today that I felt compelled to respond to.  It was an article written by the parents of a young man who died of a heroin overdose last month.  The story really touched our hearts because it was as if I was reading about Bryan.  I felt strongly that Bryan wanted me to get in touch with the writers, not only to let them know we empathized with their situation, but also to perhaps offer some comfort to them through this website.  I was amazed to receive a response a week later asking if my email could be published in a follow-up article that would appear next week.  Naturally, I said yes.  Here are links to the original article and to the follow-up articles (simply close the windows that open to return here):

Original Article

Follow-up Article (link on this page will take you to my email or you can go directly by the link below)

Link to My Email

The significance of the timing of this article -- 1 day before the two-year anniversary of Bryan's death -- was not lost upon us.  He is continually working from the other side to get his story out there!

Monday, January 9

Oh boy ... 2 years today ... my heart is heavy reliving this morning two years ago.  But I knew Bryan would be with me today and he has been.   As I got into my car to come to work today, I turned the radio on ... something I don't usually do as I prefer listtening to CD's.  Today, though, I felt there might be a message in the songs I would hear.  As I passed the church where Bryan is buried, California Dreamin' by the Mamas and Papas came on.  This immediately made a connection for me ... first, the second verse which sings "Stopped in to a church I passed along the way" and I was just passing by the church.  Secondly, California is where he and I spent our last vacation together and he loved L.A. ... in these cold winter months, he would definitely be dreaming of California.  So there was a strong connection there.  As I drove along, two hawks appeared beside the car and I noticed the license plate of a car right in front of me "EZB ... 17" ... Easy Bryan 17 ... that's how I interpreted it.  Made me smile ... then as that car pulled away, the one directly in front of it ended in 19 in the license plate and the one right beside it ALSO ended in 19 ... right side by side, 19's.  And the last song that came on the radio before I arrived at work was "Teach Your Children" by Crosby Stills Nash and Young.  Bryan was definitely a teacher (I received an email this morning from a friend of his who explained how Pisces are teachers and how Bryan had taught her) ... but the lyrics in this song that really reached out to me today was the following verse .. particularly the last words:

Teach your parents well, their children's hell will slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams, the one they fix, the one you'll know by.
Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

I felt he was telling me that he loves us and to KNOW that no matter what.  I don't know if I'll get any more signs today but, even if I don't, this morning has been more than enough.  Thanks Bryan ... I love you!

Thursday, January 12

A few days ago, my sister Lori's dog had passed away.  Her name was Dottie and she was 11 years old.  She wasn't in the best of health, but she wasn't sick or anything either.  She went in to the vet's for a routine teeth cleaning and passed away while under anesthesia.  They couldn't restart her heart.  We have all been watching for some sign from Bryan that he had Dottie with him and his menagerie of pets in heaven.  When I got in my car today to go to work, a Bee Gees song was playing on the radio.  My mom is a HUGE Bee Gees fan ... to the point where she listens to them 24/7 and Bryan always manages to have Bee Gees songs playing in stores for her.  I immediately connected the song to my mom -- she was the one who had taken Dottie to the vet -- and the song was "Stayin' Alive".  I couldn't wait to call her and tell her that Bryan was letting us know that Dottie was alive in heaven with him.  And it was validated by license plates with 17's in them shortly after I called to tell her.

Friday, January 13

Last night I had a visit from Bryan.  I asked him to please visit me in a dream -- I ask this of him frequently -- but last night he did.  I don't remember much of what occurred other than that I saw him ... talked to him about how much I miss him ... he was smiling and told me he loved me.  He gave me a big hug and a kiss and told me he had to go back to the light.  I thanked him for being there for me ... if we said anything else, I can't remember it.  Just his beautiful blue eyes and the peaceful feeling I had when he hugged me.  I still felt it when I awoke this morning. 

When I was reading my latest book this morning, Diary of a Psychic Medium, I was reading a part about a woman whose husband had passed away and this medium was doing a reading for her.  In the reading, she got the message that the husband was going to "hug" his wife at 3 p.m. the following day which was his birthday.  The woman was going to his gravesite to celebrate his birthday with her children and some of his friends the next day.  When they did, at exactly 3 p.m., a strong wind came up and the balloons which they had tied to a vase were swept toward the wife and completely enveloped her.  Her daughter made the comment that the balloons were hugging her.  As I was reading this paragraph, the memory of Bryan's birthday in 2004 -- where we held a ceremony at his grave -- really came back to me strongly.  Many people said that the two big butterfly balloons that we had there had moved from where they were and clung to me the entire time I was reciting my poem to him.  My sister said she was amazed because they were not near me any other time but when I was reading, they were literally sticking to me as if Bryan was hugging me.  And as I was reading this, the light flickered in the bathroom.  (You can read about the balloons on the entry of March 14, 2004).

Wednesday, January 25

Today Cris and I were in the computer room working on our respective computers.  Cris was listening to satellite radio while he worked and, all of a sudden, "Dust in the Wind" started playing.  I immediately turned to him because that song was one that Bryan used as a sign to him when he first crossed over.  Cris then told me that his mouse was acting up so he was wiggling it around on the desktop which caused the satellite stations to jump around.  When he stopped moving it, the song it landed on was "Dust in the Wind" ... a hello from Bryan!

Saturday, January 28

Today Mike drove in to work with me and as we were driving, I noticed two big hawks in a tree right beside the roadway in a place I have never seen hawks before.  Both of them were staring right at our car as we drove past.  I just got the biggest smile because I felt Bryan was acknowledging that Mike was spending a rare day at work with me.  It was pretty neat! 

Sherry had a visit from Bryan the other night ... he's been on her mind a lot this month due to this being the two year benchmark since we lost him.  She's been seeing lots of blue butterflies but a few nights ago, he blinked a lamp off an on in her livingroom three times.  She says it is a touch lamp and no one had touched it (except Bryan!) ... it never did that before and it didn't happen again since that night.  She and Mike both felt it was Bryan saying hi.

Sunday, January 29

Today an amazing thing happened!  I was at work and all day long it just poured down rain.  As it neared quitting time, I noticed the rain had let up so I decided to leave a few minutes early to catch the lull in the storm.  As I drove out of Canonsburg (the small town I work in), I was talking to my dad on the phone when I saw the most gorgeous rainbow.  The colors were bright and vivid and the rain was completely stopped.  I told my dad I had to hang up so I could take a picture of it, which I did.  The rainbow was bright and clear all the way to the ground yet, when I looked at the picture I took, it was all misty and cloudy looking where it had been perfectly clear (Bryan's spirit??).  Here is the picture I took with my cell phone:

Click image for larger picture

Anyway, I tried to take another picture but my cell phone said that the memory was full, so I was unable to capture another image.  I continued driving toward home -- a 20 minute drive at least -- and the rainbow stayed with me all the way.  Most of the time I could see it from end to end, just a beautiful band of color arching over my car.  As I came over the last hill toward home, I am able to see the church where Bryan is buried.  The rainbow was going right across the steeple of the chuch and the end of the rainbow was going right down to the courtyard where Bryan's grave is located!!!  This view took my breath away ... I wanted to bad to be able to photograph it but I couldn't.  I pulled into the church so I could stop and visit Bryan ... at that point, the rainbow had moved and the end of it was positioned where our house would be located.  I told myself that as soon as I finished visiting with Bryan, I would delete some pictures from my phone so I could get another picture of the rainbow.  The colors were still so bright and vivid.  I only spent about two minutes at his grave and when I went back up to my car, even though the sun was still out bright, the rainbow had COMPLETELY DISAPPEARED!  There wasn't a trace of it anywhere.  Now ... think about that ... it had been with me for over 20 minutes ... my entire drive home ... it ended (literally) on Bryan's grave and disappeared the minute I left him.  I knew it was a gift from him but ..... if there was any doubt ..... Amberly told me later tonight when I relayed the story to her that she and Brendan were talking this afternoon and she had mentioned that the only sign Bryan hadn't given us was a rainbow!!  I was unaware of her comment but I guess Bryan heard her loud and clear.

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Note:  If you have a story or experience with Bryan, please email it to me and I will add it to his journal.  These incidents have given our family great peace and joy in knowing that Bryan is still with us, if only in spirit, and will live forever in our hearts.

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